Is it not inconsistent that we, who see ourselves as a peace loving people, should thank Hashem throughout the days of Chanuka, not only for our victories over the Greeks but for the very battles that we waged against them? As difficult as it is to say, we in fact repeat at the end of every Chanuka shemone esrei, "[We thank you] for the miracles, for the relief, for the mighty acts for the victories and for the battles which you performed for our fathers in those days at this season". It is so uncharacteristic of our prayers, that one of the commentaries - the Anaf Yosef - removes the "vov" so that it reads "for the victories of the battles". Alternatively, Rav Chaim Friedlander (Sifsei Chaim) quotes Harav Yaakov Emden as elucidating the phrase to mean for "conducting our battles for us". Yet it would seem that the text as we have it simply does thank Hashem for the actual battles and this should be very difficult for us to do.
No doubt our absolutely frightening sense of the brutality of war and its unspeakable pain has been fashioned by the compassion that defines the people who are "rachmonim … gomlei chasadim - compassionate and kind". Have we not, ever since our earliest years, associated battle with the hands of Eisav, even as we distance ourselves and take pride in the voice of Yaakov? Moreover, Rashi in parshas Toldos attests to Yaakov's fear of bearing arms and having to kill, even when it will be his only chance at saving his family. Our fear of the impact of battle finds further expression in Hashem's promise to us that He will restore to us the sensitivities of mercy that we will surely lose while fulfilling the obligation of rooting out an idolatrous city (ir hanidachas). Now, how do we thank Hashem for bringing war upon us even when He brings it to victory?
The distressing perspective of recent years has suggested to me that perhaps Chazal are directing us to indeed be grateful for the manner in which the Macabean battles were waged and certainly the Shushanite struggles. Sadly, we have come to see terrorism introduce battles without borders, and bring warriors without any price for life to the city street, far off destinations, and all that lies between them. Possibly, we as people can be grateful that if Hashem has seen fit to bring a battle upon us, that it is similar to the one fought by the Chashmonaim where war and warriors were clearly depicted.
Perhaps we can suggest a deeper understanding of this phrase through an insight of the saintly Harav Kook tzvk"l. Trapped in Switzerland during the horror of WWI and pining for his home in Israel, Rav Kook published a collection of essays, Orot. In what was going to become a highly controversial collection and would forever mark his entry into the Torah world, Rav Kook addresses the concept of war as it impresses itself on the history of nations. He argues that war despite its unforgivable cruelty and unredeemable suffering, must nevertheless assume an important position in the development of peoples. There would be no other way to understand how G-d can be referred to as "ba'al milchamos - the master of wars", or as "ish milchama - the man of war". We can add that the Torah views the Jewish military camp as one that feels the presence of Hashem in its midst, and therefore models for us many of the laws that design a place in which to daven.
Accordingly Rav Kook observes that wars were more than a disastrous manner to settle disputes. Rather they were often defining moments for nations. Avrohom's battle to save Lot probably depicts Avrohom as a man of kindness more than any other event; Shimon and Levi's battle for Dina defines their brazenness and their concern for the safety of their families. Far from being a maven on American history it would seem to me that the Civil War with all of its torment, defined this nation as a people committed to ideals and morals in a manner that surpasses almost all other nations. The indescribable cruelty of the Germans and Japanese during WWII exposed their civility and politeness as being merely a facade. Using children as a human shield shows, to the honest observer, a barbaric group, just as the caution with which Israeli soldiers move through the populated streets of Jenin and Azza, defines a people who have forever treasured life like no others.
The Maccabean battle against the Greeks, where Jews put their lives on the line to hold on to Torah, its mitzvos and its culture, its opportunities of growth and Divine service, was one of those defining moments. When for some reason G-d's infinite wisdom determined that we had to take up arms, we can express our acceptance that our defining moment marked us a people who treasure beyond all else Hashem's gift of being selected to be His children in this world.