Perhaps one of the most charming comments of Rashi, if one is allowed to describe the words of our master in that way, explains the seeming banter of the angels as they visit the ailing Avrohom. Their inquiry into the whereabouts of Sarah, indicating an interest in the mundane or an ignorance of something important, is less than angelic. Therefore, Rashi explains that they certainly knew that Sarah was at home but they wanted to increase the harmony of the patriarchal tent by impressing upon Avrohom the modesty which informed all that was Sarah. Did this ninety year old couple of towering spirituality, who had weathered so much together still need to be reminded of each other's traits? Indeed, explained Rav Chaim Shmulevitz, previous Rosh Yeshiva of Mir in Yerushalyim, it really never ends and even Avrohom and Sarah would still have to consciously invest in the harmony of their home.
It is in this setting that Hashem himself impresses upon us the supreme importance of shalom bayis. He inaccurately quotes Sarah to Avrohom to avoid any ill feelings that may have been caused as Sarah refers to her husband's old age. Thus Chazal conclude that there are times and situations where shalom bayis, the concern for a harmonious and respectful home, trumps the integrity that is always demanded of us in all that we pursue.
I believe the timing of this lesson is instructive. Avrohom and Sarah are about to welcome Yitzchok into their lives and no doubt take every effort to assure that their home nurtures in Yitzchok the concern for Hashem's will that is their life. Apparently this can best be accomplished in a peaceful harmonious setting informed with respect for each other and the stability that it generates.
The sacrifice that Hashem made for the peacefulness of Sarah's home should not be lost on us. Chazal see Hashem as defined by truth, and declare that His "seal" is truth. Truth and consistency are the basis of our allegiance to Revelation and all the demands that ensued from it. It is perhaps of greater significance and not all unlike, the erasure of His name that He suffers for the sotah woman in an attempt to restore the trust of her husband. It would follow that Hashem is challenging husband and wife to be willing to let go of personal ambitions and aspirations to build a home that vibrates with the concern and respect for all its members. This home built on the bonds of loving spouses will provide the warmth that will nurture another generation of "ovdei Hashem".
Is there a value to shalom bayis, if it causes the loss of personal principle? Perhaps we will have built a beautiful frame, but one which is seriously lacking in the messages that we wish to communicate?
Perhaps Hashem is, upon deeper thought, teaching us that shalom bayis is a goal and accomplishment that stands on its own, not merely as a tool to create a stable setting for the teaching of Torah. That is why Hashem's name and His beloved truth can be bartered for a peaceful home.
Indeed bringing two disparate and often very different worlds together is the very work of creation. The days of creation saw fire and water, land and water, the physical and nonphysical all brought together in perfect harmony. How much pride Hashem must have from His children as they try to imitate His work on which He founded all that we have come to know.